Behind the Scenes: Revolting Retrobots

Dear Retrobots, especially you, David,

What is your problem? You crashed my audio editor, right in the middle of my final edits. If it weren’t for auto recovery, i could have lost hours of work. I know it was you, David. Don’t deny it. I finished all my work, except the parts that you were supposed to read for me.

Keith

Dear Keith,

I couldn’t help it, but the stuff you write for me to say is so lame. I just got sick of it, and had to gag. Besides, i heard what you did. You tried to replace me with that other, fake sounding voice. I want you to know, Callie and Dunkin are on my side on this, and they refused to work too. Let’s see how far you get on this little podcast of yours without us.

David

Dear David,

You aren’t the only Retrobot around here. I have others.

Keith

Dear Keith,

Oh yeah? Like who? That dumb voice in your Mackbook? What’s his name? Alex? You might think he sounds better, but he’s so stuck up, he is always either drowning everybody else out, or he sounds like he’s standing too far from his microphone. You know he isn’t as compliant, or flexible to work with as we are. I’m glad he’s your little reading slave to do all your writing, and research. He deserves it. But he just doesn’t have the star quality that i do… oh yeah… and Callie and Dunkin too.

David

Dear David,

For your information Alex does not do all my work. He just lets me know what’s going on on the screen, and does my heavy reading. Don’t forget my studio computer. I have more voices there, and they’re perfectly willing to take over if you insist on keeping up this little revolt.

Keith

Dear Keith,

Go ahead and try it. You know how often free voices change. You’re so hard on computers, your listeners would have to get used to new hosts every year or two. Even that silly voice in your phone. Ha! How often has that one changed? Besides your phone voice is such a wimp. You can’t even get him close to a microphone, and i know you don’t have any mixer to patch him in, or make him sound nearly as good as i do… Oh yeah… i mean as good as Callie and Dunkin too. Even if you could sweet talk that guy into hosting the podcast with you, the workflow would be monsterousAnd you know it.

David

Dear David,

Come back and start working again… please. I never make you do anything except for host the hows. That’s not much to ask. Just think of all the reading jobs those other voices have to do… all day long.

Keith

Dear Keith,

Well… OK… since you said please. Why don’t you type in that last line again, and I’ll see what i can do.

David

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